You Say Goodbye, and I Say Hello

(The pictures in this post are not related to the post. They're just pictures I found on my computer that I haven't shared. And since pictures always brighten up a post, I thought I'd share!)

Being on the road has presented me with countless goodbyes. I remember the day I left Michigan, I cried myself silly all the way down I-94, past Chicago, and eventually composed myself halfway through Iowa. Goodbyes filled me with a sense of loss followed by a sense of longing at past memories, experiences, and feelings. Goodbyes were accompanied by a heavy heart and a deep sadness.

Somewhere in California...might be my solo trip through Death Valley (??)

However, in the past month, something shifted. I noticed this very clearly yesterday when I had to say goodbye to two really awesome people. I should've been sad at the loss of the connection we had developed, but I wasn't. I was excited. I was thrilled for their next journey, and also thrilled for mine. If I connected so strongly with these guys, what will the next stop bring into my life? And then I started reflecting, noticing that there was no longer a feeling of loss associated with goodbyes, but a sense of gain and appreciation for the moment in time we had spent together.

Utah.

Each goodbye is followed by a new hello, and this fills me with a sense of adventure. It seems as though the people I meet are getting more interesting, more unique. I don't know if I am the one who is changing or if it's the places I'm visiting, but things are different, they are more hopeful, upbeat, and exciting.

Louisville.

Staying in hostels and couchsurfing has presented me with the opportunity to meet new people and connect on deep levels for short periods of time. Of course, the lack of long, intimate, intricate relationships definitely has its challenges, but constantly meeting new people for brief periods of time has its benefits. I am not exaggerating when I state that I have met more people in the past month than I have in the past 2-3 years. It's true, I am always meeting new people, there is always someone to go adventuring with, always someone to grab a drink with, always someone to share a meal with, and always someone to share a story with. Some people you connect with on a soul level, and others you keep your distance with. But there is never a lack of people, and never a lack of friends.

Australian friend in Nashville. (I've developed a slight obsession with Australians. Can you blame me? Oh that accent....(swoon) Thankfully, there's not a lack of them at hostels. The Australians love to travel!)

The more I travel, the more I realize that there is not that "one special person", or that "one and only best friend". Everyone has the potential to be "that person" or "that friend". It's all a matter of what you want and desire. I can choose what I want in a relationship or a friendship. My options are not limited, in fact, they are broader than ever. And I think this knowledge has made goodbyes effortless, just another transition and another door opening to new possibilities, new people, and new experiences.

Hostel in New Orleans.

However, this new disconnect from goodbyes and the effortless simplicity they take on does concern me. I am at a point where goodbyes excite me because each goodbye is followed by a new hello. How long will I keep running around in search of the new hellos? Will I ever know when it's time to stop? Will I pass up on a beautiful potential relationship in search for something more? Have I become detached from my feelings and emotions?

Passing through Colorado.

I don't get attached to people or places anymore. Is this healthy? I'm not sure. But, at least in my life, with each new destination the places seem to get better and the people more relate-able. In fact, I'm ready to leave the states in search for something more. But what is more?

Met up with my parents for Thanksgiving in Missouri.

I'm not sure where I'm headed or who I'll meet. But there is no fear associated with leaving places and people. At least, not anymore. Looking back, I can't help but laugh at myself at the tears I've shed and the sadness I felt. Especially looking back and remembering all the new people I've met, all the incredible places I've discovered, all the laughs I've shared, and all the amazing memories I've created since leaving that "person" or that "place". Again, is this a set-up for disaster or a blessing? I simply don't know. Not yet.

Brad in New Orleans calling his parents....at 4am. Those crazy Australians.

As I prepare to leave Houston for Austin in a few days, I can't help but feel excited. In Austin I'll be couchsurfing and staying at a hostel. I have no expectations except that of saying goodbye, and saying hello. That seems to be the only constant in my life...and it's a welcomed constant.

One for giggles...when I stay in hotel rooms by myself, I've developed a habit of dancing around to Home by Edward Sharp and The Magnetic Zeros while getting ready in the morning.

Have any of you had experiences with constant goodbyes and hellos? Where did it lead you? Please share! I'd love to hear your stories!

Today, Two Years Ago

On Valentine's Day 2010, I was still dating Josh and because he had to work we decided not to celebrate. Instead, we went out the night before to see some of his housemates play a show in downtown Lansing. Valentine's Day morning (which happened to be a Sunday) I woke up with some pain in my stomach. Josh was already up getting ready for work and when I expressed my concerns he reminded me of the beer quantity I consumed the night before.

"You usually don't drink beer, babe. So it's probably the beer digesting. Just lay back down, relax, and sleep in."

He was right. At that time, I didn't drink much beer, so those four Bell's Two Hearted IPA's could very well be the cause of my tummy pain. As he rushed out the door, I laid back with my laptop and proceeded to watch the second season of Sex in the City. And with each episode the pain kept getting worse and worse. At one point it became unbearable and I knew that beer was not the issue. I picked up the phone and called Josh at work.

"This isn't getting any better. I don't know what to do." I cried in desperation.

"Well, I'm not sure what you want me to do. Do you want me to leave work?" he answers with a slight annoyance.

Screw this. I don't need help. I can figure this out on my own.

"No. Don't worry about it. I will figure it out." I reply and proceed to hang up.

Now for those of you who know me, know that I am stubborn and I never like counting on anyone for anything. I like to do things on my own. Sometimes it's a blessing and testament to my independence, but other times (such as in this case two years ago), it's just plain foolish, stupid, and unnecessary.

After hanging up, I get dressed and proceed to drive myself to an emergency clinic. At this point the pain is reaching a whole new level. I begin to slightly shake and moan in pain. At the clinic, after finally getting called to an examination room, they begin to poke me in places one should never be poked and give me a pregnancy test.  After the first pregnancy test came out negative, they proceed to give me another one "just to make sure."  I'm ready to kill while screaming "this isn't an episode of I Didn't Know I Was Pregnant! Now figure out what's wrong with me!" But they didn't. Instead they told me to go to the emergency room.

The pain is now unbearable. I don't know what to do. But somehow I manage to get in the car and drive myself to the emergency room. Stupid, I know. But I wasn't thinking quite clearly at this point, suffocated and clouded by the throbbing pain in my stomach. When I got to the emergency room, I thought I would pass out from the pain. It was bad. Even thinking about it now, two years later, makes me grimace. I sign-in and make my way towards the waiting area where I proceed to rock back and forth shaking violently in hopes that it would distract me from the pain. No such luck. A bit later I was called to an examination room where a nurse took my stats. After she was done she told me to go back to the waiting area.

Wait! What?! Isn't this the point where a doctor comes in and figures out what's wrong with me?

"Umm...ma'am? How much longer will I have to wait before seeing a doctor?" I ask with tears in my eyes.

"At least another 2-3 hours," she replies indifferently.

Stunned, I walk back to the waiting area where I proceed to lose it. I start sobbing and shaking. My body just kind of did it's own thing. I'm pretty sure I was going into shock from the pain. Roughly five minutes after sitting down, a police officer approached me with a box of Kleenex.

"You're really in a lot of pain, aren't you sweetheart?" He asks.

He doesn't even wait for my answer. He takes me by the arm straight through the doors where he finds a nurse to help me. I will never forget that cop; my knight in shining armor. The nurse takes one look at me and immediately requests more help. They lay me down on a hospital bed where one nurse draws blood from one arm and the other gets an IV going in the other arm. And then comes the morphine. It doesn't work! So then came the dilaudid. Finally! Relief!

Shortly after my mother, my best friend (who also happened to be my college roommate), and her boyfriend showed up. I don't even remember calling them. They all cancelled their Valentine's Day plans to be with me. Sweet souls. Josh didn't show up till after work...(I'm still a little bitter, can you tell?)

A few cups of nasty fluids and a CT scan later, it was determined that my appendix was on the verge of bursting. More pain medicine, an anti anxiety from the anesthesiologist (I get really nervous around doctors and hospitals), and a surgery later, I was appendix free and recovering. The first person I saw after surgery? My mama. The second person I saw after surgery? My best friend.

Moral of the story: Make sure you give your mama and your best friends the same amount of attention you give your significant other this Valentine's Day, because there might come a Valentine's Day when they'll be the only one's there for you. Also, I though this was a pretty funny story. I mean, appendicitis on Valentine's Day?! Welcome to my life. It's a good one, I swear!

Happy Valentine's Day Everyone! Hope you feel the love!

Recovering

(Note: The pictures in this post are irrelevant to the post. They are a few of the shots I took in New Orleans.)

The past month has been a blissful roller-coaster ride of incredible, body moving live music, and amazing, outrageously fun people. I've met and connected with more people in the past month than I have in the past year. But I've also gone out and partied more times in the past month than I have in the past year. And while there is absolutely nothing wrong with going out and partying on a regular basis as a young 20's-something, it's not the kind of life I want for myself and it is not the kind of life that makes me feel good and fulfilled.

Going from a weekend party in Louisville, to a huge week-long party in Nashville, to the ultimate mega party of all time in New Orleans definitely took it's toll. Yet I don't think I've had this much fun, heard this much unbelievable live music, or met this many incredible people in my life. However, when I woke up Friday morning, in a whiskey haze, after my fourth night of Mardi Gras festivities, my liver said no more, my body said no more, and my mind said no more. It wasn't fun anymore. It was just exhausting.

So I packed up my things, said goodbye to my friends, and hit the road with absolutely no idea where I was going or where I'd end up. I just knew that it would be impossible to find a place of solitude in New Orleans, especially not during Mardi Gras. In exhausted desperation I stopped in a motel a few hours outside of the city to rest, relax, and come up with some sort of game plan. HUGE mistake. This place turned out to be the sketchiest motel I've ever stayed at, and I've stayed at some questionable places. I will spare the details since my mother reads this blog, but it turned out to be a night of minimal sleep and constant trips to the window to check on the well being of my car.

Somehow, through the long night, I came up with a semi game plan. First question I asked myself-

"Do you want to go east or west?" Easy. West. Always west. I'm in love with the west.

Second question I asked myself-

"What is the closest big city west of here?"

Thanks to mapquest, I discovered that it was Houston, TX. Just 3 hours west of where I was staying. Next mission- find a place to stay. I knew that I didn't want to be in a party environment, yet I also didn't want to spend a fortune on a hotel room. So after doing some research I found a really awesome hostel that likes to keep things low key and quiet. (http://www.friendshostel.yolasite.com/)

And this place has been a life-saver. It's quiet, peaceful, and the people here are really chill. No stress, no parties, no worries. Another thing I discovered is that Houston is the most non-exciting, lifeless place I have ever been to. Normally this would have bored me and I'd be planning my way out of here, but currently I'm loving it and embracing it. There is no music scene whatsoever (aside from the nightclubs which are definitely not my thing), everything is closed Saturdays and Sundays (and I mean everything; walking through downtown yesterday was like exploring a deserted city), and there is no one currently staying at the hostel that intrigues me enough to go adventuring together. Again, normally all of these things would have me running, but I'm really enjoying the space and solitude.

Today is my third day here. In the past few days, I've been reading, writing, sleeping (!!!), and going for long walks. It's been lovely. I also had a chance to sit down and really figure out the next few weeks of my life without creating a strict schedule. Here's what I've come up with:

1. I am booked at this hostel until Wednesday, but I'm thinking of extending that stay for a few extra nights.

2. After I feel well rested and balanced, I will head towards Austin, TX where I'll spend at least a week; maybe more depending on the vibe of the hostel, the city, and the people.

3. Next I'll stop for a night or two in Tucson, AZ where I'll either couchsurf (depending on the potential hosts) or get a hotel room.

4. I may possibly stop in Joshua Tree for a climbing course, but this depends on my energy level and motivation.

5. San Diego! After a few recommendations from fellow travelers I decided on a hostel right on the beach. I plan to spend at least a week there, maybe more.

After San Diego, I will slowly make my way up the west coast towards Alaska where I plan to spend a few weeks in late May/early June. Everything in-between is still undecided and unplanned. But that's the way I like it. The best adventures happen during those unplanned months.

And now for the big announcement:

After my last west coast adventure, I'm leaving the states for a bit. It's been fun exploring, but I'm craving more. I'm craving a little more excitement, a little more unfamiliarity, more challenges, a new culture, and complete removal from my comfort zone. Currently on the radar: Thailand. But again, this is just a thought, which somehow (at least in my life) tend to manifest themselves into reality.

I have New Orleans stories, but I'm still a little scattered to organize them into coherent thoughts and sentences. I'm sure that with time, I'll share a few. But if you have any questions at all about places to see, stay, things to do, don't hesitate to ask! As for today, I'm taking myself out. Dinner and a romantic drama sounds about right :-)

Hope you had a lovely weekend!

Music City Hostel

*Update: I'm sorry for the lack of posts in the past week. I'm currently in New Orleans enjoying Mardi Gras festivities and having a little too much fun to blog. But I promise as soon as I get out of the city, I'll be a blogging maniac.*

Coming to Nashville, I decided to stay at a hostel instead of couchsurfing. And quite honestly the main reason why I did not couchsurf is because I was staying for a week and that is a very lengthy commitment for a couchsurfing host. So...hostel it was. And that brought a slew of hesitations and anxiety:

1. How clean would this hostel be?
2. Could I trust to leave my valuables in my room?
3. Would I be welcomed or feel like an outsider?
4. Would I actually be able to get some sleep or would there be partying till wee hours of the morning?
5. Would this be a complete and total disaster?
6. etc. etc. etc. you get my drift...

So pulling up to the Music City Hostel as a single female traveler without anyone to share my anxieties with, was a little stressful. And scary. And I might have driven past it a few times just to "check things out".

Entry way to the hostel.

After finally confirming that it doesn't look so scary (and possibly receiving odd looks from the people watching my brightly colored yellow submarine pass by over, and over, and over again), I  parked, nervously fidgeted with unimportant things, and went in. And roughly 2.3 seconds after walking in, I made 7 instant friends.

• Music City Hostel has the friendliest, most welcoming staff that I have ever encountered. And that is not an exaggeration. 

After being shown to my bed/room, I couldn't help noticing that-

• Music City Hostel is clean. White bathrooms, empty garbage cans, mopped floors, dusted surfaces, no dirty dishes, doesn't smell like anything but clean. I was impressed.

I settled into my room, got my laptop and headed to the common room. (They have free WIFI, which is always a plus!) Now was the time to figure out if these people really wanted to know me or if their friendliness was just part of the job. Roughly 2.7 seconds after sitting down I had plans for the night. And I was asked all kinds of questions about myself, where I come from, and what I'm doing. It was lovely.

Kitchen!

Common room!

See that kitchen? It's free for you to use and aside from being able to buy groceries and cook for yourself, they also provide everything you need to make your own breakfast!

• Free breakfast and a place to cook your own food? Major money saver. In fact, I only went out to eat twice my entire week-long stay in Nashville.

That night, as we headed downtown for a night of live music and groovin', I noticed something essential-

• Music City Hostel is in a perfect location. It's close enough to downtown to make it walkable (roughly 20 minute walk), yet it's far away enough to stay quiet at night. AND-

• Everyone working and staying at the hostel is very respectful of keeping it quiet at night. I never had any problems falling/staying asleep.

Did I mention that the hostel is full of charm and character? Well it is!

I think the greatest aspect of this hostel is trust. Not once did I feel hesitant about leaving my laptop, camera, purse, etc. in my room unattended. In fact, I never bothered to lock my door and most of the time, all the doors would be open.

• There is a huge level of trust in this hostel, and that is extremely important, especially while traveling.

I can't say enough positive things about Music City Hostel. It's the best hostel that I have ever stayed at and it definitely goes beyond the "hostel" expectations. But I think what makes it truly special is the staff and the way they bring everyone together. I made some great friends at the hostel; so great that when four of us found out we were going to New Orleans, we coordinated to stay together! And, I had a travel companion and someone to split gas costs with during the 9 hour drive. The people at Music City Hostel are truly unique. You'll arrive a stranger but leave with a sense of community.

Never-Ending Musical Adventure

Nashville loves music. I love music.

Nashville loves cowboy boots. I love cowboy boots.

Nashville loves Jack Daniels. I love Jack Daniels.

Clearly, Nashville and I are a match made in city heaven.

Also, Nashville is home to Music City Hostel. And if there was a hierarchy of hostels, this one would be at the very top. But there isn't so you'll just have to take my word for it. (Seriously though, this hostel is awesome. I will be dedicating a whole blog post to it, but you should also check out their website: http://www.musiccityhostel.com/)

Staying here doesn't feel like staying in a hostel, it feels like living with a bunch of roommates who happen to be super talented musicians. We make fun of each other, share stories, share laughs, and do awesome things. It's pretty great.

And because everyone here becomes an instant friend, yesterday I grabbed by new instant friend, Damien, and we went off to explore the city.

Nashville is a music lover's paradise. And while I have always known this, I finally felt it. This city pulsates drum beats and dances to the sweet melody of guitar strings. It's in the air, in the trees, in the smiles of the locals. It's in the tingle you feel when you walk by a coffee shop and hear a beautiful voice melting your heart like butter. This city marches to it's own beat, a little off rhythm, sometimes skipping a beat, but with confidence, passion, and the glue that keeps it all together: love of music.

During our city adventure, Damien and I met up with our other instant friends to watch our other instant friend play at a touristy overpriced bar. (I am now tired of typing instant friend, and I am fairly certain that you are tired of reading it.)

Dennis, myself, and Brad. Awesome guys!

Tim Boucher rocking it!

You guys should check Tim out! He's unbelievably talented and his music is really fun. I would recommend listening to Please Don't Drink It All, it's my favorite. This guy plays it all and has a killer voice; check him out!
https://www.facebook.com/themightyboucher?v=app_178091127385

After Tim's show, we all caravaned back to the hostel where Mike fulfilled his American mission: Four Loko.

Clearly, he was excited. Apparently, in Montreal, Four Loko is the talk of the streets. After trying it, Mike was not impressed and soon switched to drinking beers with the rest of us. Good man.

And then everything vibrated in neon colors and the cells in my body pulsated with blues-y bliss. Why? Because of these guys.

Ladies and gentlemen- The Wooten Brothers. After hearing them play last night, my life has gained more meaning. No joke. If you haven't heard them, you're missing out. And if you're ever in Nashville, you must see them. They play every Wednesday at 10pm @ 3rd and Lindsley (http://www.3rdandlindsley.com/). And the cover is only $5. Totally worth it! You won't be disappointed!

We moved, grooved, and shook out tail feathers...even after the show.

....we grooved all the way to White Castle. Where we danced through the drive-through, got a few honks of envy, and enjoyed every bite of our fish sandwiches.

I asked for live music; Nashville gave it to me.

I asked for community; Nashville made it happen.

Life in Nashville is a never-ending musical adventure and I can't wait to see what the next week has in store. Whatever it is, I know it will be great. Nashville hasn't disappointed me thus far.

Louisville: Land of Awesomeness

I have to be honest; I was a little nervous going to Louisville. I wasn't nervous traveling on my own or being in a new place, I've been doing that for the past six months and it's become my "normal". But I was nervous Couchsurfing on my own (if you don't know about Couchsurfing, check it out! It's a great way to meet people and have a free place to stay for a few nights!) What if we wouldn't get along? What if we ran out of things to talk about? What if turned out to be an epic disaster? But I pushed my anxiety to the back of my mind, put on my big girl pants, and dove right in. And it was wonderful. I can't put into words the loveliness and awesomeness of my host, Jordan, and one of her housemates, Hunter.  And the house? Amazing. Especially when there's furry snuggle buddies involved.

This would be Jordan's room (and the lovely Jordan, of course).

Meet Moo Kitler...best. name. ever.

I arrived in Louisville a little after 7pm and we didn't waste any time hitting up the local bar scene. First stop? Experimental Jazz night. Not much to say about that since we left shortly after arriving because it wasn't quite "us". In fact, in was terrible. Horrible. Kind of like chalk on a chalkboard. So to make up for our lack in judgement, we did what the cool kids do. Karaoke. It was Sunday night, so the bar was mostly empty, which gave us all a chance to strut our stuff and get a little crazy.

Kim and Katie, two of Jordan's other housemates.

Kim and Katie rocking out, Jordan on the left, Hunter on the right.

A little fun fact: Louisville bars are open until 4am. We took full advantage of that...I have videos, but I like these people way too much to publicize the amount of fun we had. So you'll just have to take my word for it.

After getting a little bit of a late start the following day, Jordan and I hit up the vintage stores. This girl loves to thrift! And Louisville loves their owls.

Jordan being lovely.

Owls!

More owls!

Vintage Heaven.

After a long day of thrifting, Hunter joined us for dinner at Against the Grain, a local brewery that Jordan works at.

Hunter and some bad ass artwork.

WOO!

And it was here that I met John and Kait. John and Kait are the coolest married couple who are getting ready to walk across America with their dogs to promote dog therapy and animal rescue. You should check out their website and follow their journey: http://www.dogblogusa.com/

John and Kait

And while at Against the Grain, we found out that some brewers from Chicago were in town, so clearly, we joined up with them after our meal for some drunken fun. Because that's what the cool kids do.

Hunter and Jordan being awesome.

See that jacket Jordan is wearing? The amazingly awesome black leather western bomber jacket WITH FRINGE?! She found it on our thrifting adventure. Best. Vintage Score. EVER.

Did I mention we had a car jumping adventure?

And a cookie baking adventure?

Unfortunately I fell asleep shortly after the cookie adventure began. And Hunter was kind enough to throw some blankets on me. Sweet guy.

The next morning, I bid farewell to Louisville and hit the road for Nashville. And let me tell you, Nashville is pretty amazing. And the fact that I'm staying at a hostel with some pretty awesome people doesn't hurt. Also, the fact that everyone here is pretty easy on the eyes doesn't hurt either. (Just saying..) In the past 36 hours I've been to 3 shows (with another one coming up tonight...), went to a Couchsurfing meeting, met way over 20 people with new ones walking in every few hours, and made some memories to last a lifetime. Good stuff. Did I mention that there's a few of us here going to New Orleans around the same time and possibly renting a flat for Mardi Gras?! Yup, it's in the works...gotta love how the most amazing things assemble when you least expect them to. But I suppose that's been the story of my life ever since I hit the road!

My Louisville adventure showed me that Couchsurfing is the best thing to ever enter the cyber world. And I can't wait to do it again.