Why so blue?

I have a confession to make.

I've got the blues.

For the past few weeks I've been feeling deep sadness, loneliness, and dullness. I haven't been excited about my life, I've lost that spark in my eyes and the pep in my stride, I've been feeling angry for no particular reason, and little things that would normally go unnoticed have been causing unnecessary stress.

A lot of you may be asking, why? And I was asking myself that question for weeks. Why am I feeling so depressed when I am living my ultimate dream, when my opportunities far exceed my wishes, and when the whole world is pulling me by the hand begging to be seen? Believe me, I was just as confused as you are. And then it hit me.


Travel burnout.


I am burned out. I have driven over 15,000 miles through the states, visited 3 different countries, driven countless 16 hour days, constantly on the move, not knowing where I would sleep or where I would end up by the end of the day. For 6 months...nonstop.

And it's been so much fun. I have learned and experienced more than I could have ever imagined. But it all happened so FAST. And I am so tired. I am physically, mentally, emotionally, and spiritually exhausted. My whole being has been pushed to the limits in every way imaginable and I haven't given myself time to rest and process.

All the places I visit are starting to blur together and planning my next adventure seems more of a chore than the joy it used to be.

And then there's the travel romances. I am a fool when it comes to love, and therefore my heart breaks every time I leave. And I always leave. I always run away in fear of being hurt and instead I end up hurting myself. It's time to stop running and face those little demons lurking inside...I mean, it can't be as scary as jumping out of a perfectly good airplane or trusting a 1/4 inch rope to keep you from falling hundreds of feet, right?

So what now?

Time to slow down.  I need to grow some roots and integrate everything that has happened in the last 6 months. It might be for a month, it might be for a few months, it might even be for a year, but the idea of being in one place for a little while brings that spark back in my eye and the pep back in my step. It won't be forever; I am a lifetime adventurer and thrill seeker. It's in my blood. But my goal in life is happiness, not crossing things off my list. And right now I'm not happy, but I know what I need to do and the changes I need to make to get there again. I've got a few ideas in mind, and I will share as soon as they begin unfolding. The one thing I can tell you for a fact is that I will not be staying in Michigan. Other than that, stay tuned :-)